Monday, November 3, 2008 @4:20 PM
just another wordy post~~~_Emotional insecurity_Insecurity is a feeling of general unease or nervousness that may be triggered by perceiving oneself to be unloved, inadequate or worthless (whether in a rational or an irrational manner).
A person who is insecure lacks confidence in their own value and capability, trust in themselves or others, or has fears that a present positive state is temporary and will let them down and cause them loss or distress by "going wrong" in future.
This is not to be confused with humility, which involves recognising one's failings but still maintaining a healthy dose of self-confidence. Insecurity is not an objective evaluation of one's ability but an emotional interpretation, as two people with the same capabilities may have entirely different levels of insecurity.
Insecurity may cause shyness, paranoia and social withdrawal, or alternatively it may encourage compensatory behaviors such as arrogance, aggression, or bullying, a principle enshrined in the phrase "all bullies are cowards." Many people suffer a period of insecurity during puberty, which gives rise to a lot of the stereotypical behaviors of adolescents.
Insecurity has many effects in a person's life. There are several levels of it. It nearly always causes some degree of isolation as a typically insecure person withdraws themselves to some extent. The greater the insecurity, the higher the degree of isolation. Insecurity is often rooted in a person during their childhood years. Like offense and bitterness, it grows in layer fashion, often becoming an immobilising force that sets a limiting factor in the person's life. Insecurity robs by degrees - the degree it is entrenched is the degree of power it has in the person's life.
As insecurity can be distressing and feel threatening to the psyche, insecurity can often be accompanied by a controlling personality type or avoidance, as psychological defence machanisms.
Insecurity can be overcome. It takes time and patience and a willingness to believe each person (and specifically oneself) is in fact of innate value.What is insecurity?Insecurity is:
-Feeling of not being ``good enough'' to meet the challenge of a situation you face in life.
-Sense of helplessness in the face of problems, conflict, or concerns.
-Belief that one is inadequate or incompetent to handle life's challenges.
-Perception that life is unpredictable with most of the expectations you have to meet not clearly understood.
-Sense of always climbing up a mountain, never being able to reach the top.
-Sense of lacking support or reinforcement where you live, work, or play.
-Inner turmoil coming from a lack of direction or bewilderment as to where you are going, what your goals are, and what responses are appropriate for events in life.Why are people insecure?Insecure people may have:
-Experienced a major tragedy or loss in their lives and are having a difficult time in accepting this loss and adjusting to the ``change.''
-A poorly developed self-concept with low self-esteem, lacking belief in their personal goodness, skills, or abilities.What do chronically insecure people believe?-What is the sense of trying, I'll never get it right!
-Once a failure, always a failure!
-There is only one direction for me to go in this organization and that is down and out!
-I don't fit in here or anywhere else for that matter!
-People are just nice to you in order to use you and get something they want from you! What are some negative effects of insecurity?People who are insecure can:
-Have difficulties in establishing healthy, long-lasting relationships.
-Become victims of fears that impair their freedom of action or choice.
-Be candidates for paranoia feeling "others'' are out to get them.
-Be over-controlled emotionally, having problems letting others in on their emotions. This can lead others to guess what is going on until the passivity of the insecure person leads to an over-reaction by the others, resulting in conflict or rejection.How can insecurity be overcome?In order to overcome insecurity, people need to:
-Be willing to be put in vulnerable positions in life where they might get hurt.
-Trust others enough to expose themselves to them, risking vulnerability and the possibility of being hurt.
-Have a healthy and humorous belief in themselves in order to overlook their exaggerated need for acceptance and approval.
-Arouse the courage to take small steps in learning to experience success and overcoming their lack of belief in self. Once the success is experienced, they can build on it to gain the courage to act out of a strong conviction in their self-goodness and worth.
-Break the barrier or outer shell of the self-doubt they have hidden behind and reach out to others. Breaking out of their ``shells'' requires letting go of past hurts (real or imagined) and moving on with life.
-Open themselves to the possibility of success and accomplishment. Visualize or make a prophecy of winning at life so their energies are focused in a growth direction. after readin through these research... Hmmm.. mayb i'm nt so insecure afterall.. or shld i say, nt totally insecure lah.. it's just a feelin of emo-ness n loss for tots on wad u really wan... or is it things just appear to seem like it's fine n i'm findin it uneasy? or is it there r some stuff nt voiced out? or is it these or tat????? or rather it's becos i'm too bored at wk to have draft all these out??? haha.. mayb mayb...~~~
